Progress Report and Weight Watchers

Hello there!!! 1 month, 9 days since my last weigh in.......5lbs. I've lost 5lbs. At first I was a little disapointed because I have been working really hard at this, but then I thought, I am 5lbs lighter than I was a little over a month ago, another month from now I'll be another 5lbs lighter and that will be 10lbs and so on and so on. I am not giving up on this.

Today I tried Power Pump. A weight lifting class at the gym. It was different from the exercise that I've been doing lately, so, my muscles were screaming out "What The Hell are You Doing?" I am definitely exhausted from it, but well worth it. I will be going again. Also, the instructor for the class is the person in charge of the gym's facebook page so I talked to her about bringing my camera to class and take pictures and she said yes. I even get some free tickets for the classes :) I am very excited about it.

In other news, I signed up for Weight Watchers yesterday. Not sure if I'll be able to keep up the point system, but I am giving it it a shot. It seems pretty simple. I get 25 points a day and the online points tracker is easy to do. So, we shall see how it goes......

Down

I don't want to complain or write about my down days, but after thinking about it, I decided I might as well, hopefully I do loose weight and I can come back and laugh about these days. It's actually been two down days, and by down I mean, days that I really can't see myself loosing all this weight and just feel hopeless. Yesterday I went to Zumba. It is really a fun class, I don't know anybody there, but I really enjoy the music. I haven't gotten new shoes, so my feet hurt afterward, but what bummed me out was a glimpse that I got of myself in the mirror. During the class I stay in the back and avoid the mirrors, well, I saw myself at some point during the class, and I looked so big! I know that I am overweight, but when I saw myself, I just felt so sad. Sad because I did this, I did this to my body and it is so hard to loose this weight. It's been almost two months since I began my journey and feel like I haven't lost any weight. It is annoying to me that it is such a big part of my life, trying to eat right, make sure that I don't over eat, make sure that I work out.... it is really hard to shake off a bad day and think tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow I will eat better, I will work out harder. I know that it is too soon to really see results, but, it is so frustrating!!

Frustrating....

Today has been frustrating. It started out good, but after seeing my doctor about my paxil medication (for anxiety) I got anxious about my weight loss. I have been taking Paxil for about five years now. Well, recently my doctor informed me that Paxil makes you crave carbs, so, he decided to lower my dosage. That didn't work out, I tried the lower dosage for about a week but my anxiety was through the roof and I decided to go back up. Immediately I noticed the cravings he was talking about, but I did my best to ignore them. Today at my appointment he talked about how much harder it is going to be to loose weight with the higher dosage and how hard it is to ignore the cravings blah, blah, blah. Needless to say I could NOT stop thinking about the cravings.

I have read that writing down everything you eat helps, I didn't really see how. But I realized that at the end of the day I start to worry about how much I ate and what I ate. So, I decided that I am going to start writing down everything that I eat through out the day.

I had a good work out today, I walked/jogged on the treadmill. I could not find my ipod so I listened to music on the computer and it wasn't as fun, but regardless I still feel that I got a good work out. Tomorrow I think that I will go to Monte Berico to climb the stairs a few times. I don't have tennis shoes since my dog chewed my old ones, so I won't go to the gym until the new ones that my hubby bought me come in the mail (I can't wait)

Well, that is enough for today, hope that tomorrow it is better as far as my struggle with cravings go :)

Weight issues

I guess everyone has weight issues. It's all over the news and magazines. Well, I have weight issues, I can't stop eating! I was always skinny up until I had my second daughter, Isabelle. I never went back to being the weight that I was before I had her, but it wasn't until I moved here to Italy that I gained 30lbs! I have tried to loose weight a few times and failed miserably. I worked out with a friend of mine for about six months, we did eleptical and a body combat class three or four times a week. For that time I didn't gain any weight but I didn't loose any either. I know it was because I still ate whatever I wanted. I just refused to change my eating habits. (I know it's stupid) Anyway, then I started to work and it all went to hell! Earlier in the year I went to a nutritionist and she put me on a 1,200 calorie a day diet. I followed it to the T. I also started walking on a treadmill my friend let me borrow. I lost 12lbs! But I was also starving all the time! My mom, dad, and sister came to visit for a month and yep, it all went to hell. Traveling around europe showing my family around, didn't help with my diet. Eating out all the time, and trying those once in a lifetime foods, I gained the 12lbs back. I just haven't been able to get back to working out. The more weight I gain, the lazier I get. I look horrible, I can't stand to look in the mirror and I don't take any pictures of myself. I hate to complain about it because I don't do anything about it, but it is so hard. I've never had to loose this much weight before and I also suffer from an anxiety disorder, so I get anxious about anything and the first thing I do is eat! I hate it. Anyway, I am going to stop complaining now.